Hi! SMILE! :))Thursday, December 24, 2009
The days are rolling as usual.. lol
its x'mas eve wooyay! (:
lemme get this out
dun think you'll gna be reading this but yea,
where to start...
i can safely say we were a pair once,
and i know its my fault for breaking your heart and til a few days ago i felt guilty for it every single day and the feeling sucks, trust me. It was a blast for my childhood knowing you and having spent time with you, you were straight, direct and weren't afraid of awkwardness, the dire opposite of me i guess? and maybe that's what i saw in you? You were my best friend then and i always felt great talking to you. It was my fault it turned out the way it did coming towards the end of our primary school days and you'll most probably won't forgive me totally and i know i deserve it.
from the song lonely;
"Cant belive I hadda girl like you and I just let you walk right outta my life, after all I put u thru u still stuck
Around and stayed by my side, what really hurt me is I broke ur heart, baby you were a good girl and I had no right, I
Really wanna make things right, cuz without u in my life girl"
I hate myself everyday for doing the thing i did and well if i could turn back time i'll NEVER do it again, cliche but wtheckz. Ever since then i tried my best to atone for my sin but i know whatever i do it'll never be enough. Sec 1, 2 and 3 i tried my best to try and make you forgive me, and although you said you already did, i'll never believe it till i forgive myself i guess...? And i come to realize ever since then i didn't really like you... just was trying to earn your forgiveness maybe? no matter how hard it takes... 5 years, you were the only one for 5 years though for you i know its different, but i think its time for me to finally let go and forgive myself? I went through alotta shit as well, from you and from people alike, but i don't wanna give in, until now. You are slowly being less of the girl i knew and fell in love to and more of the type of girl i hate. The main reason why i hang on to this for so long although i know "it" will probably never come true again is so that I, myself, can forgive what i have done, and i think after 5 years, i should forgive myself. Even after that time when you called me and asked me that.... You've taken a path i.. can't follow anymore. Whatever happens you cans till always find a friend in me as always. HAIZXXXZXCZXCZXC$%^&()_
somehow i just cant find the right words. ><
its x'mas eve! (:
santa's making his last checks weee :D
i've been a good boy i sumpa-ish-ly swear! :D:D
Elec guitar/New Hp FTW please!! :D:D
anyways... in light of all the things that happen so far, at least i've learned from my mistakes and moved on a better man.
1) Never repeat my mistake
2) Treat with care and dignity
GAH peace out!
few more days to sch reopen, fuckit.