Ah perhaps i'm listening to this awesome song too much le but yea.

You. My favourite you.
We all have that point in time, where we know and can safely say, we've found our other half, the one which makes us whole. I thought i found my half then, after just 9-10 years of life? Ignorant as i was, I was so sure of it. Then you came along and changed everything, for the good and the bad. Those times we spent together were awesome and I cherish every single one of it. You were my many firsts, you were my... happiest moments and saddest moments in life thus far. Cliche a lil but YOU were my favourite hello and hardest goodbye. Yes I admit, I'm guilty for what I've done of all charges on that fateful day, I did not understand the consequences of my.. mistake. And no matter how hard i try, I'll never forget and forgive myself for what i did, I will always wear this chain of guilt wherever i go.

Saying I was young and immature will be just a lame excuse. But once I've really understood the calamity of my actions, I've lived to regret it ever since. I've always kept it in the dark, only telling it to a few indivisuals worth this info. But deep down I'm ashamed of what i did ok. And has spent.. my ENTIRE Secondary school life trying to... "repent for my sin" Through this long hard 4 years, not once did i ever forget you, never did i ever let you go. For four years, i tried my best to make up for it, IT meant that much to me. You were my only one though i can't say the same for you. Though you've entered and left my life over and over again during this period of life, I still held on to you knowing we could still be together, one day, even after it all.

It's been.. six years since i first met you. Six sweet and painful years. I know most guys would not hold on for more than five but you were.. special? And to put things into perspective, we were only in... 1/4 of a class once... chinese. And somehow you changed my life more than you can ever imagined. Though i can safely say i did the same. Through this six years it has been hard. Friends after friends told me to give it up, and that i'm foolish for holding on to.. something fruitless. But i promised you,

"I said I'd never let you go, and I never did.
I said I'd never let you fall, then I always meant it."

I would like to keep to this promise no matter what. Somehow as time passes it gets harder and harder as the feeling gets weaker and weaker with every hurdle. You are, special, one of a kind. No matter what changed, no matter what, I always wantED to keep that promise.
These few weeks, whatever I said, I meant, whatever I felt, I felt. But the prospect of Deja Vu always looms in my mind. I could not.. escape that fact I guess. Cliche much, but "True love knows no boundaries" I've kept to that, but have you? The first song you've ever introduced to me, OUR song. Everlasting Love - Jamie Cullum. I wanted this to be everlasting, I really did. Maybe i was hanging on to a hopeless case, sinking ship, but i know it was all worth it. Hah. "I just needed a love to last forever." Maybe i was foolish to think so in these times.

Now, things seems cool, improving. Or maybe this feeling is one-sided. There are times, I really try, I try my best, i really do. Just wanted you to know this. I don't know how it ended the way it end, but i really meant to harm. I swear. As for the feelings i have, though maimed through the years, it has remained resolute throughout, including now. You say you have mixed feelings, then well I say this is the final straw. What is, will continue to be, but I tell you this, it will not last long, as 6 years... is all i can give. It's now or never. Regretfully. I can't give myself a chance if you don't. So, this will be the.. Happiest Hello, or Saddest Goodbye. Your choice, your call.



I'm... ____ _______



Algebra ftw. Maybe this is the reason why my mathematics deproved so much, hah. ><"
I feel, no, am lame. :/